I’m risklessly trading high yield
And oh what power I wield!
I struggle with the math
To back it up a half
My runs are all a minefield
I just did a big trade for some jack
But from my client I’m under attack!
“You made a half, don’t deny
And you better not lie–
You saw what happened to Litvak!”
My London desk isn’t so great
But a client has taken the bait!
With my trader I confirm
Is your offer still firm?
The reply: he’s on the tube m8!
For a Dino respect is required
They tell stories so that they’re admired
“I’d trade blocks all day
at Bear and DLJ!”
Then how come you haven’t retired?
What I IB my analyst is clear:
“HEY NERD DO U LIEK THE BONDS HERE?”
In a nutshell–
Is it a buy or a sell?
Never got a straight answer in my career
On my trading desk sits a buffoon
Where my axes all go to their doom
My trader’s a clown
It’s a total fall down
My relationship’s gone with a boom